Are you from Buenos Aires?

Esto es algo que lo leí en ella (que vive en Montreal), que lo escribió él (que vive en NY). Para los que se fueron o para los que están y muchas veces no analizan su cotidianeidad.

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- At any time of the day, a café con leche and 2 medialunas can be considered a square meal.

- You would much rather be a bostero xeneise than a maldita gallina, and you know what that means.

- Nothing is good anymore, it's bárbaro.

- You have accepted the fact that you cannot successfully walk across 9 de Julio before the lights turn red, because everyone knows it's the widest avenue in the world.

- Your guía T is old and falling apart, but you still won't leave home without it.

- You consider both superpancho and choripan to be hearty meals.

- Based on taste alone, you can pick out a Terrabusi alfajor in a double-blind test.

- You complain about everything while in Buenos Aires, but as soon as you leave, you begin to miss it.

- You know the attractive women all over Palermo Hollywood are really men, but that's OK.

- No matter how hectic life gets, you can always find time to tomarse unos mates.

- Nothing is cool anymore, it's re-canchero. You and your friends, (who are all capos and copados, obvio) are re-chochos because you just saw a recital that was alucinante.

- You have forgotten your name and now only answer to a string of epithets, such as che, maestro, flaco, papá, tigre, fierita, pibe, etc.

- You don't coges el bus or tomas la guagua, you subís al bondi.

- You don't go out to comer, you go to morfar.

- You know where to see the movies for 2 mangos, but still go to Village Recoleta because it's top.

- You eat sandwiches without crusts, pizza with a knife and fork and empanadas with your fingers.

- You find yourself eating ñoquis on the 29th of each month, and not really knowing why.

- You stay out till 6 am at a boliche but are still fresh as a daisy for your class at 9.

- You mix ketchup and mayo, slather the beastly concoction on everything, and have the audacity to call it salsa golf.

- You don't find it at all confusing thatthere are streets called Peña, Rodríguez Peña, Luis Saenz Peña and Roque Saenz Peña, all in fairly close proximity. Nor that there are an Yrigoyen and Irigoyen that intersect, despite their different spellings.

- It makes perfect sense that the seediest redlight bars are directly alongside Recoleta cemetery, where the Argentine aristocracy is buried.

- You feel comfortable wearing alpargatas just about anywhere.

- You can't imagine drinking coffee without briskly following it with a shot glass of mineral water.

- You are a self-made expert on EVERYTHING.

- Your favourite thing to do is fiaca or huevo, the special actions of not doing anything.

- You drink your mate amargo but eat dulce de leche on everything.

- Everything is a quilombo.

foto: gettyone